Her Jaw Line
by blueforu
Summary: When your life is in ruins and you can't piece it together can a new start be the only way even if your treated like trash for a party that you can't place? Tori Vega point of view everything will slowly be shown about the history and truth!
1. Chapter 1

I look down at my journal once again.

"It shouldn't be this hard" taking a deep breathe I decide to sketch instead.

"There's always tomorrow" I try to reassure myself as my hand twirls making two eyes, _this _could be you.

Ignoring the eager to grab out my color pencils I instead focus on making this picture come to life.

Flipping my stick of led around I erase the nose trying to make sure it _did not _match yours.

"I shouldn't sketch you" _again_ "It's just too creepy" I mumble knowing no one sees me.

"Maybe if I look at her" I shouldn't look but _I need _to make sure I didn't copy _your _looks again.

Looking away from my worn down journal I take a deep breathe and search the crowded hallways.

There you stood leaning on your boyfriend, piercing blue eyes that made my stomach do flips; you'll never _really _see me but I hope one day that I can at least show you what you mean to me.

Looking back at my journal I notice I drew your jaw line and I don't have the nerve to erase it.

Biting on my bottom lip I try to come to terms that you, Jade West coolest chick attending Hollywood Arts High School will never _like _me, Tori Vega.

"Why does that thought course pain straight to my stupid heart" Fighting the urge to run to the always empty janitor closet and break down I instead try to draw anything but you.

Maybe I wouldn't be so fixated with Jade if I had _real _friends.

"Yeah that's it, nothing more" The bell rings signaling everyone, including me to head to their class.

Getting off the ground I count the amount of steps I take so I don't look up and see that I will _never _be anything to her.

"I hate myself"

Xxx

Mr. Lewis tells the class to "be quiet" but is a classroom ever just quiet?

Anyone with half a brain knows that Cat Valentine will chat away with _Jade_. Sometimes the airheaded red head will talk about her boyfriend, who is different every week or even worse Cat will try to get Jade to talk about her new boyfriend, Beck.

I always hold my breath when I hear Jade talk about her _sex _life or about how amazing Beck is with his tongue.

The idea alone makes my stomach drop.

"Vega" My head snaps up, I hear Cat, and a few other girls laugh at me, the dork.

"Yes Mr. Lewis?" I hate when I speak it always comes off as weak,_ I hate myself_.

"Maybe you could come up to front of the class and do this problem seeing as your doodling!" Mr. Lewis's face always gets red from the anger he has towards me even though I get good grades in his class.

"Yes Mr. Lewis" A few guys join in on laughing at me.

Being in front of the board I'm unsure if he wants me to go step by step or just write the answer.

"Well don't just stand there figure it out" His round face gets redder from yelling at me.

Taking the chalk I write fifteen, "Fifteen? That not the answer" His voice is just too sharp making everyone who was laughing pick up in volumes, even _hers_.

I can't stand it!

I just want to scream and just –

"Sorry Mr. Lewis" setting the chalk down I go back to my seat and spend the rest of class trying to drown out heated words.

Xxx

Gossip always spreads fast around Hollywood Arts and it's never in my favor.

I try not to sit near anyone knowing that I'll be called 'freak' or "cunt" and that's the words said to my face.

No wonder I have no friends, "I'm disgusting".

From where I'm sitting I can see Jade and her group of friends as she feeds fries to her boyfriend.

I notice Cat pointing at me, she probably retelling how I'm such a loser.

"Just great, that just what I need for myself esteem."

I chuckle at my idea of a joke "Like I have a self esteem."

Grabbing my journal the only thing I ever bring with me beside my purse and _I know _this is the only thing that helps me _feel, _less negative_._

Flipping to an empty page that didn't have Jade's face I try to remind myself why I even got into this stuck up school.

My right hand twirls eyes but their _different_.

I can't make those different eyes shine like they use to.

Those are the same eyes that would stand up for me making me remember _why _I even followed my _dream_.

"Hey freak!"

I inwardly groan _Rex __Shapiro _which meant his twin _Robbie Shapiro _was with him just when I was starting to feel like I wasn't worthless.

"What?" I ask with a smile knowing that Cat probably sent her on again off again boyfriend over here to tease me or _something crueler_.

"Don't stare at me or my fucking girlfriend" Rex's black curly hair made him looks like he got it off doll; no a cheap puppet.

I wanted to correct him because it should be, 'my fucking girlfriend and I' but I rather not be a smartass to the schools psycho.

"I'm not" it was the truth I would _never _look at Cat Valentine mostly because she wasn't as hot as she believed she was.

"See she wasn-"

"Shut up Robbie" I was a bit shocked that Robbie would even speak, _Robbie _should know better.

"But she not doin-"

"What the fuck Robbie" Rex yelling at Robbie feels like it's my fault, _if only I wasn't born_.

Robbie had curly hair just like Rex but he was a paler, weaker, and sadly cooler then me. His square glasses scream 'nerd' but no beside Rex picks on Robbie.

Rex is fit, shorter than Robbie but he has a tan and from what I've heard a very large dick.

Robbie looks at his shoes and then at me, breathing in a deep breath making him like a rip off of superman.

"No she didn't do anything"

Rex looked like he was about to snap.

"What did you just say to me?" Rex grabbed Robbie's shirt bring him down to his eye level.

"You heard me" Robbie's voice sounds like a squeak compared to Rex's deep smoker like voice.

"Don't make me hurt you" Rex's voice is giving Robbie a chance to back down.

What should I even be doing?

"I'll call mom" Robbie starts to nod his head making his glasses fall off.

I point to myself just make sure his nodding is not from stress and when Robbie nods I get up off the group slipping away as a crowd forms around the brothers.

"What should I do?" My eyes search as teachers and students make their way over to the not yet fight.

Slipping into the background I wait till the teachers disable the group of teens and _once _again bring Rex down to the front office leaving Robbie to answer a few yes/no answers.

"Don't chicken out" shutting my eyes just to reopen them I walk over to Robbie.

"Are you okay?" Robbie just gives me a crooked smile; he looks so _different _without glasses.

His glasses!

Moving over to Robbie I pick up his black square glasses "Here, you kind of dropped this."

Robbie's laugh makes me feel _better_.

"I guess this marks the beginning of our _friendship._"

Sophomore year was finally looking up.

Xxx

**A random thought I had and hope someone likes it :] if not tell me why! Please review**


	2. Chapter 2

I don't bother calling out knowing my father is at work and my mom is probably either getting drunk or sleeping with her boss.

"It feels so cold here_" even though we have a fireplace_.

I use to never feel alone because there once was a time when my family was, _whole._

Setting my purse and journal on the red couch that had ugly brown pillows, I try not to think about my family.

"People change, we all change" I'm unsure if I should even stay downstairs.

"I'll just get a snack and leave" looking at the ground I count my steps trying to ignore the family photos.

It takes eighteen steps to make it to the kitchen "That wasn't so bad."

Walking over to the fridge I notice once again we don't have food.

"Just great" Shutting the fridge I search the orange cupboards till _finally _I find a bag of cheese puffs.

As if stuck in an old routine I grab a bowl and pour till it's full.

"Should I sit at the table or eat in my room?"

Searching the kitchen I see the very one blue wall, it makes my heart ache.

_I miss her_

Walking over to the couch with my very unhealthy dinner I _make _myself look at our last family photo.

Everyone was wearing dorky sweaters.

My dad's short black hair was slicked back and my mom was leaning on him like she loved him.

My mother's hand was placed on my fourteen year old self shoulder and I was being hugged by my older sister,_ Trina_.

Trina is- was amazing, her eyes were shining as she looked at me instead of the camera like everyone else was.

"I wish Trina was here" I try to shake away my thoughts but shaking only makes the memories crash around me.

Trina was two years old than me and always promised that she would be here for me.

"She lied everyone lies" but I couldn't believe my own _lie_.

Trina and I were going to a public school waiting till my dad saved enough money to send Trina to Hollywood Arts.

Everything was supposed to be fine and it was until Trina met Ryder; he changed everything.

Trina was never home and started to get into trouble.

My dad tried and so did my mom neither could help Trina.

I didn't understand at fourteen why she was changing, I still don't.

"Ugh" I start to rub my temples trying not to think "I can't go back, it not my fault" _it's my fault_.

Taking my bowl of cheese puffs I run up the stairs to my room hoping that somehow my reality wasn't real.

_"I hate myself"_

Xxx

"This is your entire fault David!"

My mom is screaming at my dad again over what happened to Trina. Soon he'll leave and my mom will get so wasted that tomorrow morning she'll believe I'm Trina.

"Why couldn't it have been me?" My room was dark; looking over to my alarm clock I notice it three in the morning.

"Just great I have school" guilt hits me like a bag of sticks "It should be Trina going to Hollywood Arts not me."

I had started Hollywood Arts only a few months ago because my old school held memories, all of them bad.

I couldn't walk down the hall without freaking out. Now I'm at Hollywood Arts the same school Trina had been accepted to before-

"Oh shut up Holly" The slamming of the front door and the sound of my mom sobbing "Please come back" lets me know everything the same.

I knew my mom wanted Trina back not my dad or even I.

"Trina was her everything"

Shaking my head I look up to my rooms ceiling and count the fake stars.

"I wonder what Jade does when she can't sleep."

Xxx

The sound of my alarm clock blaring 'Beep Beep Beep' wakes me up faster than having cold water poured all over my head.

"I hate waking up" Whipping my blankets off me I try to stretch the sleep away.

Finally feeling my back pop I hit the blaring alarm and get out of my bed.

"One day at a time"

Xxx

After getting out of the shower and drying myself off I try to plan an outfit out mentally.

"Why should I even bother?" I ask my mirror self demanding an answer I already know.

_I have a friend now_.

Walking out of the bathroom wearing just a towel I try not to look at Trina's bedroom door.

"She not coming out"

Every time I see Trina's bedroom door I can't help but expect at any moment for Trina to rush out telling me to 'hurry up' or that my outfit was 'damn'!

"I miss her" going to my bedroom, I open the door and can't help but grunt at how blue my room was all because of Trina and how she was to busy flirting to notice she bought three cans of blue paint instead of the purple I had wanted.

"It her fault we have one blue wall in the kitchen"

Smiling I open my closet doors and fight the urge just to throw on a hoodie and some jeans.

"I have to get over this"

I slowly get dress as I fight the urge to cry "Most of my clothes are Trina's."

They would have stayed Trina's if she never met Ryder and started to dress more _freely_.

Not allowing my anger to control me I go over to my mirror and put make up on.

"Trina!" My mom's yelling made me mess up my mascara.

"Fuck it on my nose" taking a wipe I try to get it off my nose without freaking out.

"Trina!" My mom's yelling was piercing my eardrum like a knife cutting butter.

"Don't say anything" I whisper to myself as I finish up correcting my mistakes.

I hear a thump against my door and know my mom wants me.

"What mom?" I ask while looking at my outfit, I was wearing a simple long shelve shirt that said 'New York' and my skinny jeans that helped make me look like I had an ass. My hair was straight and all I need was to put my black three inch high heels on and I would be able to leave.

"I miss Trina" her words cut me deep "I miss my baby."

Unlocking my door I slowly open my door just incase my mom was leaning against the door for support.

"Hey mom" I give her a small smile till I notice the bottle of vodka she was holding.

"Tori I got to go to work" Her hand not holding the bottle is placed on my face "Don't be stupid like your father."

Slurring my mom walks into my room and falls face first into my bed.

"Just great"

Xxx

After setting up a bucket next to my bed along with water and an aspirin I put on my high heels grabbing my journal and purse while walking outside to my car, Trina's old car.

"Please let there be no traffic"

Xxx

The ride over to Hollywood Arts went by fast, almost to fast.

Looking over the parking lot I notice a spot open that's in the front.

"Just pull in and don't crash"

As I neared the opening I felt my stomach drop, _they were there_.

Jade, Beck, and Cat where all leaning against a black jeep while Robbie and Rex seemed to be whispering to each other.

"Should I park here or not?"

Looking at the clock I realized my choice "_Oh fuck me!"_

As I parked I noticed Cat's sneering face at my very beat up yellow bug.

"It doesn't matter don't let it matter"

Turning off the car I opened the door clinging onto my things.

I have to lock the doors to my car, manually.

"Hey bitch" Rex's voice is filled with a thrill that's makes my skin crawl.

_Breathe just slide the key into the lock and – okay one down._

Walking around the back of my car as Rex starts to whisper to Cat whom finds whatever he saying to be _so funny_.

_Okay last door just slip in the metal part of the key and lock up the shop._

My hands shake a bit as I slip the key in and lock the door I try to block out the sound of Cat and Rex whispering about me being a, _whore_.

Walking away I hear a cat call and the sound of someone one being slapped _with force_.

Xxx

_Before class_

Hollywood Arts is divide into groups of music kids, actors, writers, and sketching or what Trina use to call the _finer arts_.

A faint smile reaches my lips as I walk into the very large and open space that the art room has to offer.

Allowing myself to look at everything in detail I notice a table with random bits of broken vases or glass.

It appeared someone was going to make an art work titled _the broken_.

The next few things I saw where paintings or photography photos that were complete or needed to be done.

I felt myself gasp as I saw a picture that was _breathtaking_.

Someone had taken scissors and broken them only using the sharp pointed like ends that shined like glass as shimmers of colors filled the cracks making it look like a face of a _girl_.

"Hey don't drool on it" I felt a trickle of a breathe on my neck as harsh words pull me away from this world making me move away from the piece of art to stare at my shoes.

Jade West_ talked to me!_

Waiting for her to grab her art work I hear her grunt of distaste "What the fuck are you looking at?"

_I hadn't been staring!_

I slowly look up to notice her eyes glaring, piercing my soul.

My tongue felt heavy as I mumbled "Vega" pointing lightly to the art work next to hers.

Turning her gaze away from me she looks at my uncompleted art work that most believe was complete.

"Who is the drawling of?" Her voice held a cruel humor "Some other girl you drool at while looking across the lunchroom?"

I felt my heart sink, I _don't do that!_

Going over I try to grab my artwork as Jade places her hand over the bloody red tree.

"Tell me"

Her words were a statement not a question and my gut clench "My older sister."

Her face unchanging "I've never seen her around before" it was almost as if she didn't believe me.

Jade held my gaze and for the first time I noticed her eyes were a mix of blue and green.

The sound of the bell ringing made Jade (who had moved closer to me without me even taking notice) removed her hand as fellow students started to come in one by one.

I let my hand grip the canvas and my vocal box worked without my permission "She died."

Xxx

**Well that chapter two and I know it's horrible but eh what I think doesn't matter only the people reading this so PLEASE review I need some feed back to get motivated and sorry for the wait twenty more days till I get my high school diploma. Yeah :] Senior year went by fast! **


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